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Dangerous Compassions

slipping into the previous relationship

Hello, reader.  How are you doing?  I have a problem with slipping into the previous relationship, after deciding on a change.  Do you have that problem? My good friend told me they had changed things with their ex. “Then you have done the thing,” I said.  “You are like a god now.” I looked at… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

harm as intimacy

Hello, reader.  How’ve you been?  I’ve been thinking about harm as intimacy for some time now–a few years.  I don’t know a lot about trauma bonding, but maybe they’re related.  When someone loves me but can’t get close to me for whatever reason–I set a boundary, or I’m pulled far away–they can get intimacy with… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

psychiatry is a scam

Hello, reader.  How are you doing?  I’m struggling through a rough patch.  You know me–I’m critical of mainstream medicine.  Psychiatry is a scam.  Sometimes I went to psychiatry when I thought I had to, before I had better ways of living. I’ve had about 40 or maybe 50 psychiatrists in my life, since being diagnosed… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

Ming’s blessing

Hello, reader.  How are you doing?  Often I ask Ming to pray for me.  For many years, his prayers were silent.  Then all of a sudden, he prayed for me with words.  Wow–incredible!  Where did that come from?  I want to tell you about Ming’s blessing. Ming’s blessing It was something like this. May you… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

pneumonia

content warning: pneumonia topic, hospital mention, death possibility “You know how you’re having a baby, and it takes a while.  So you’re looking for all different positions to try,” I said to Ming. Ming has pneumonia.  Hopefully you have never had it, reader.  If you have, you might know how it’s really hard to sleep. … Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

how to build interdependence

Hey, reader–what’s news?  My good friend and I talked about the difference between codependence and interdependence.  I loved thinking together about how to build interdependence. Love is a skill we can strengthen, though I don’t hear people talking about that much.  Some of the self-help, therapy-type healing content I see around, like on instagram, includes… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

what abandonment is

  Hello, reader.  How are you doing?  I’ve been thinking about what abandonment is.  Also… What’s commitment? What’s chosen family? How do we shift painful relationship dynamics into something happier? How do we take space / time off in fair ways? What’s most important in close relationships that culture might not give us names for?… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

how to break up with someone

Hey, reader.  How’s it going?  I wrote this poem I thought you might like called how to break up with someone.  That’s quite a skill which…. how do we learn? I guess through movies, tv, witnessing domestic violence as children, maybe a country western song?  How do we learn how to do anything?  Mostly through… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

when your kid is in the mental hospital

Hello, reader friend.  How are you doing?  Here’s guidance when your kid is in the mental hospital. My soul-nourishing loved one had friends in this position.  So she asked me for my thoughts, and I had a lot of emotions as I answered her.  Some of my ideas might sound defensive, because of my own… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

to feel safe

Hey, reader.  How are you?  I made a list for my friend of all the things she does that help me feel safe.  I thought there were just a few things.  But once I started working on the list, it got longer and longer.  Wow–so many ways. But the list is particular to her.  I… Read More »