Categories
Dangerous Compassions

codependency

Codependency is a concept to explain a relationship situation many lovers find ourselves in.  Loving men who are addicts–that’s the type of codependency I’m most familiar with, from seeing that in my family of origin and in my own life. I believe the whole concept of codependency exists to blame the victim, and I’ve seen… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

what to mourn

Hello, how are you doing?  I’ve been thinking about what to mourn.  Here’s a list of ideas if you need some alternatives to mourning what others are mourning.  I imagine a flower falling into a hole in the ground for each of these items listed. what to mourn Mourn your own childhood.  The good parts,… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

how I talk to myself in my head

Hello, how are you doing?  I would like to tell you how I talk to myself in my head.  When I’m suffering and losing hope, when I’m in need of comfort, and when I’m going to sleep, this is how I talk to myself in my head. Is sleeping really hard for you?  It’s one… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

how people talk shit about their kids

Hello, how are you doing?  It’s always bothered me, how people talk shit about their kids. cafe example Ming and I were at a cafe the other day, and I heard an adult stage whispering to another adult, “She’s very high strung.  I try to make her understand how to speak with me.  She’s like… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

keeping the x in Ventura

Hey, thought you might like to see me doing my best, keeping the x in Ventura. It was a great day.  This artist friend I barely know for many years and her newish boyfriend came to visit us.  We gathered at the farmers market.  I got some delicious foods, like persimmon walnut candy, green olive… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

sigh

When I was a kid, sighing was a scary sound.  It was a sound my dad made when he was upset, and it meant someone else needed to fix his feelings real quick, or we would all be in trouble.  His sigh was a sign that we had a few seconds until things got violent.… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

how not to domestic violence anyone

Hello, I’m excited I made a new mini-zine: how not to domestic violence anyone. How not to domestic violence anyone is about relationship skills.  Many people grow up with domestic violence.  Being told not to lash out physically in arguments is one thing, but knowing how to accomplish that is another.  A lot of people… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

sexual trauma and dentistry

Content warning: mention of sexual trauma and dentistry Hello, how are you doing?  I want to speak of sexual trauma and dentistry because it’s a great example of how people need different things, and bodies differ.  Shame is not a good motivator for all people, and my outlier needs didn’t come about from choices I… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

good girl

I was sitting in the car while Ming walked at a park.  It was a very windy day, which is why I was sitting in the car–the wind was too harsh for me to endure. Some people were flying kites.  I liked to watch.  I favored a box kite with neon pink, orange, and green… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

New Mexico

Hello, readers.  I’ve been learning about New Spain as occurred in New Mexico.  It’s really uncomfortable because it’s rearranging a lot in my head.  Things I fully believed are not true.  Sometimes learning hurts. Ming sent me this link about Santa Fe de Neuvo Mexico. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Fe_de_Nuevo_M%C3%A9xico It hurts because it relates to my personal mythology… Read More »