Categories
Dangerous Compassions

Oregon

“The hicks and the hippies had a baby.  They named it Oregon,” I said to Ming. It was early morning, and we were talking about camels.  Hmm, made sense at the time.  Water, carrying water, tons of water.  Yes, the desert and this biome here are sort of opposite. green Oregon is a place I… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

three year death anniversary

Hello, how are you doing?  It was my mom’s three year death anniversary.  I felt a lot of feelings including grief.  What a hard day to get through.  Just keep breathing, eating, and survive. My good friend elsewhere expressed sympathy, then asked how I was coping.  This friend is very smart and musical, with a… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

divest

Hello, how are you doing?  I’ve been thinking about breaking up.  My good friend is about to break up with a partner.  It’s been a long time coming.  I did that divorce ritual with my housemate a couple weeks ago, when she quit her job.  Breaking up is a weird extreme thing to do.  I… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

saying I love you to men

Hello, how are you doing?  I had a realization yesterday.  It was that saying I love you to men is almost always a bad idea. Wow, I thought if I felt love or was doing love, I was supposed to say it.  Clarity is usually an important thing, right?  Wrong!  Saying I love you to… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

the earth is my home

Hello, how are you doing?  Toward the middle of the homelessness of me and Ming, I wrote this poem The Earth is My Home. It’s important to me because it speaks exactly what I was feeling at the time–a clear delivery from Mother God.  It’s about home, putting love at the center of well-being, and… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

transgender day of remembrance

Hello, how are you doing?  Ming and I tabled zines at a transgender day of remembrance, here where we live now in Oregon.  Wow, it was intense. We make little altars wherever we go.  The only one who can protect me from sliding to death in my grief is the Mother of God.  I held… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

rose

Hello, how are you doing?  Ming and I went to Thai food the other night.  We needed some dinner.  In the parking lot, I saw this rose. It’s like a rose my mom would grow in her garden.  When I was a kid, her favorite color was red.  When I was an adult, not sure… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

art is transcendence

Art is transcendence.  I love art as spiritual experience.  It’s a reason I’m still alive.  What else would I have done?  I’m not good at making money.  I didn’t make any people.  Art is how I live.  Art and love. I was talking about how art is transcendence with friends in a small group ministry… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

what I was crying about

Hello, how are you doing?  I’ve been thinking about what I was crying about the other day, when grief flooded my body.  Sorrow knocked me over for a while.  There’s so much to feel. How big are your emotions, lately?  Are you getting your needs met?  Is the world nurturing you how you need? Can… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

music my mom liked

Hello, how are you doing?  I’ve been thinking about music my mom liked.  I’ve had a playlist of music I associate with my dad and his death for a long time.  When I feel my grief for my dad stuck inside me, I can hear these tunes and cry.  It’s helpful. But I finally started… Read More »