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Dangerous Compassions

safe to project onto

Hello, reader.  How are you?  I was asking Ming which of my needs he helps meet.  That was a cool conversation.  He told me some ideas that surprised me.  One surprise was my need for someone safe to project onto. projection Ming is the person who taught me that so much of social interaction is… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

new needs list

Hello, reader.  How are you doing?  I made a new needs list. what I want–in this house and generally to show up as my whole self give + receive respect my skills & gifts used – recognized -appreciated good investments emotionally spiritually – the amount that works for me to be included pleasure to try… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

expectations

Hello, reader.  How are you doing?  Hopefully I have a tasty idea for you today.  I’ve been thinking about expectations. Many people–especially women–are condemned for having expectations. That’s me. *Laura-Marie raises hand* I’ve been multi-criticized for having expectations over the years, mostly by men who were getting a lot from me, while they gave back… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

mercy

Hello, I wrote something about mercy that felt important to me.  It’s some truth I sent as a post-argument email.  The ideas matter to me, and maybe it could enjoy a larger audience. Mercy = I don’t deserve your consideration.  Please give it to me anyway.  I’m a creature who makes mistakes.  Please see my… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

chemical castration

Hello, how are you doing?  I was thinking about mental health, psych meds, capitalism, power, and chemical castration.  I had an idea that feels important; I would like to tell you. what is chemical castration? I’ve heard “chemical castration” refer to the practice of destroying someone’s sex drive with medication because of harm they’ve done,… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

unbalanced power in relationships

Hello.  How have you been?  I’m thinking about unbalanced power in relationships.  I was on instagram and saw a post by a therapist I like Nedra Glover Tawwab.  She is so smart and direct.  I don’t always agree with her ideas.  But she gives me such tasty food for thought. People talk crap about social… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

transgender day of remembrance

Hello, how are you doing?  Ming and I tabled zines at a transgender day of remembrance, here where we live now in Oregon.  Wow, it was intense. We make little altars wherever we go.  The only one who can protect me from sliding to death in my grief is the Mother of God.  I held… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

dear man

Hello–how are you?  My friend and I were talking about DBT, and they reminded me how DBT has some cool acronyms.  They like DEAR MAN.  Yes, me too! Here is a nice handout describing it. https://dbt.tools/interpersonal_effectiveness/dear-man.php dialectical behavioral therapy Have you done DBT?  Some people do it in the hospital.  I did it outpatient for… Read More »

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Dangerous Compassions

how to recover from an autistic meltdown

You know I do self-care all day, and I’m pretty amazing at being good to myself.  Ming supports me, and he is very kind to me.  But sometimes, very rarely, I lose my shit.  I wanted to write about how to recover from an autistic meltdown.  Here is my process for the most recent one.… Read More »

Categories
Dangerous Compassions

animals

Hello, how are you doing?  We have been having some weird experiences with animals, lately.  Thought I’d tell you about it. tarot Of course, I’m an animal.  I’m doing the friendship artalong this month, and the theme is tarot.  I embroidered myself as the Fool, but myself as a Fool bison in a green dress. … Read More »