Hi, reader. How are you doing? I like to desire journal. Please join me in this wellness skill. I want to tell you what I want more of, these days.
gratitude first
Ming and I gratitude journal every day. I’ve talked before about how important it is to me, to know what Ming is grateful for so I can help them get more.
Likewise, it helps me to know what I feel grateful for so I can help myself get more! It’s grounding, fun, informative, and even when I feel like shit, gratitude helps brainwash me into sunnier moods. So much in culture is trying to brainwash us into buying things, believing in politicians, environmental destruction is fine, and other nonsense. Might as well do some intentional work toward functionality.
It has a reputation as new age bullshit, but gratitude journaling helps me stay alive. It’s part of my survival– that’s no joke!
desire journal
Then a few months ago? we started to desire journal as an experiment, five things each, after the five things each of gratitude. I want to be in touch with what I actually want, rather than reacting to life circumstances, challenges / problems, and what other people want.
Wow, what a great idea. I love to desire journal because it gets me into the mentality of imagination. What if I could have anything? Not confined to what’s realistic, I desire journal
- silly wants
- huge longings
- simple things that can be easily managed
- impossible things
- emotional desires
- relationship desires
- delicious meals
- visions of cultural change
- mutual aid
- justice in community
- far off fantasies
Sometimes I realize that what I used to desire, I no longer desire, which is great to know. Then I can shift what I do, to match what I actually want these days. Shedding old desires is exciting, to make room for accurate ones.
more of
Lately in my journal as I struggle to climb out of March madness still mid-April, I make a “less” list, and a “more” list. Feels grounding to sort my intentions. The “more” list feels like desire journaling in a slower way.
Some items on my “less” list lately are over giving, restriction and obligation, being responsive to people who aren’t responsive to me, and being stuck in a rut.
Now I want to list a bunch of things I want more of lately. Maybe you’ll find you want more of the same.
more
- curiosity
- learning something new
- kind self-talk
- hugs / touch with people I trust
- delicious salad dressings
- bisexual beverages
- prayer
- rest
- thanking people
- protein
- humor
- movement– dance
- focus on what I like
- what I’m good at
- what makes me happy
- information about mason bees
- listening to people speaking in Spanish
- telling the whole truth
truth
I’m here on earth to tell the truth; that’s what my writing, art, and relationships are for. But sometimes I tell only half the truth– the half which is easier to say.
Lately I realize that I need to take my truth further, to the full extent. If I stop at 5 / 10 when I need to say 10 / 10, I’m doing a disservice to myself and to everyone. I need to tell the whole truth to at least myself. Preferably to Ming and other people I’m close to, and to others as well, if that’s safe to do.
Often I feel like a shiny green leaf who needs to unfurl to the full reach of who I am. I want to take up space, be real, and not worry about being palatable. I’m a middle aged person now and have some amount of security and stability with Ming. I’m not a jumpy kid anymore.
I want to use the privilege of my relative safety to speak up even when what I have to say might ruffle feathers.
questions for discussion
- What sparks your imagination?
- Do you have full permission to dream?
- Do you unfurl to the full extent of your being?
- How do you plumb the entire truth?
- Are you safe enough to tell the whole truth?
- Have you been shamed for your desires?
- What do you want?
