Hello, reader. How are you doing? I was talking with a new friend about communication, neurodivergence, and considering audience. I explained how I’m always considering audience.
What a fun conversation. I enjoyed the ideas as something I don’t usually talk about. Then I thought you might like to read too.
So this post considering audience is fleshed out messages I sent to my new friend. I love you and want you to be happy. Communication is so important to relationships and staying happy. So any hints I can share, I share with you. Love is a skill we can strengthen. I strengthen with you.
writing to a reader
I am always writing to a reader, when I’m writing prose like a letter or blog post or zine. It’s part of a real or imagined relationship.
On the other hand, when I’m writing poems, it’s more what springs to mind in a magical / spell / inspired way. Like art when I make visual art– it’s coming from Spirit or the other side. It’s not considering a viewer.
When I decide whether to share or not share visual art– whether to share it online mostly– I’m considering the viewer. But when I’m in the act of making visual art, it’s about creating a holy, direct representation of the divine.
pitching
Considering audience is considering relationship, something I’m always doing. Like how I’m pitching the ball, as a baseball metaphor. Only I’m pitching the ball to be hit, not to be missed.
Writing to you, I’m imagining you, correctly in some ways and incorrectly in others, but doing my best. Then hopefully over the years, I’ll get more accurate. I learn about you and refine my understanding. My view of you is always in flux as our relationship is in flux.
I love how telling stories to different people, they come out differently. I love how various people inspire different details and tone.
People have different attention spans and capacities for detail. People have whole different ways of understanding reality / unreality. I love talking to people with long attention spans and huge capacities.
I’ve thought about considering audience a lot as a teacher. Back when I taught university and community college especially, I wanted to maintain a sparkling depth to the discourse, without leaving anyone behind. I would err on the side of brilliance and trust the people who were less invested to let some of it go. I wanted the discourse advanced– let the less invested students ignore parts they didn’t grasp, or rise to the occasion.
rest and spices
I think a lot about helping the reader / listener, like shorter paragraphs. Many readers feel overwhelmed by long paragraphs, so I keep them short. The space between paragraphs helps people rest and process.
I see it like making foods. I want a lot of spices, but I need to make black-eyed peas everyone can eat at the gathering. Then some people can add hot sauce.
But when I’m cooking for just me and Ming, I know the limits better and can make something more custom to us.
manipulation and misunderstanding
Being authentic while also well-received is a lot to juggle. I think of manipulation as having a selfish deception to it. I think of tailoring something to an audience / considering audience as neutral or caring.
This has happened to me before– I gave praise, but people couldn’t understand my tone and thought I was being snide. My smile was misread as a smirk. In some situations, I would explain my intentions, and the person would not believe me. They wouldn’t budge from their misreading. That was frustrating and heartbreaking because the relationship was harmed.
a note on nudity and pictures
My readers are brilliant, and I can trust you with so many things. But some topics are still taboo. Many people are weird about fatness, nudity, and sex. If I take a picture of myself when I’m not wearing a shirt, some people are uncomfortable about that, even if no forbidden parts are showing.
This post’s selfie I took at a park yesterday; I was wearing a tank top, catching winter rays of sunshine. But somehow the thin straps of the tank top aren’t in the photo. So considering audience, I would like to assure you that I was wearing a shirt!
The sun doesn’t care if I wear a shirt. But I need to consider how people are, not how I am, or how I wish people would be. I want to meet people where you’re at, so I can’t expect people to be frogs, angels, rocks, coyotes, light, fog, or planets.
In some ways I’m a regular person. My height is average, and my eyes are brown, like so many people’s eyes. These days I can drive a car and do many regular things.
But in some ways like emotions, moods, voices, practices, goals, and values, I am the freak of the world.
Always I’m still learning how other people are inside. Probably my whole life, I’ll be figuring it out. Considering audience, I want to respect you while respecting me.
