Hello, reader. How are you doing? My favorite song lately is Man In the Sky. I thought you should hear it, if you haven’t already. It’s by my dreamy missing / deceased pretend girlfriend Connie Converse.
It’s an old-timey song from before I was born. I like it because it’s about falling in love with Orion. Orion is my favorite constellation which I see first and without trying, and it thrills me. I think a lot about that gorgeous belt and the sword which I actually think might be a dick. Just going to come out and say that.
The song has a moral at the end which is mostly hinted at, and a lot of style. It’s an art experience for sure–zone 0 familiar, yet other-worldly.
But also it’s comfort, how songs have their repeating parts and can comfort us like sleepy blanket-grasping toddlers who ask “again, again!” Also I love the time-travel of being held by an old timey lady in her thoughts. I wish she would be my dear. In a small way, she might be my friend reaching through time.
radishes
It reminds me of this Wallace Stevens poem which I have loved since I was a teenager. I think this poem is about God getting a boner for a radish-offering nun.
CY EST POURTRAICTE, MADAME STE URSULE, ET LES UNZE MILLE VIERGES --Wallace Stevens Ursula, in a garden, found A bed of radishes. She kneeled upon the ground And gathered them. With flowers around. Blue, gold, pink, and green. She dressed in red and gold brocade And in the grass an offering made Of radishes and flowers. She said, “My dear. Upon your altars, I have placed The marguerite and coquelicot. And roses Frail as April snow; But here,” she said, “Where none can see, I make an offering, in the grass, Of radishes and flowers.” And then she wept For fear the Lord would not accept. The good Lord in His garden sought New leaf and shadowy tinct. And they were all His thought. He heard her low accord, Half prayer and half ditty, And He felt a subtle quiver, That was not heavenly love. Or pity. This is not writ In any book.
man in the sky
Obviously I have a thing for mythology and inappropriate love. Maybe like I can’t stop worshiping Harriet Tubman. Oh wait– that’s appropriate!
Well, who am I to say what’s appropriate. Leave that to others to decide. I’m just going to live.
ps
The whole reason I know about Connie Converse is my chosen family member sang There Is a Vine to me a while back. I adore that song which is about boundaries.
Who is your gate unlocked to? Where are you always welcome?
Like everything, it makes me miss my mom and her unconditional love which I look for all over, in the most unusual places. Thank you for being patient with my tears, reader. So human, right?
