Hello, reader. How are you doing? I am adjusting to home after a transformative trip I took with my friend.
When I got home, I had a big My Life Is All Wrong attack. It wasn’t PMS time, the classic My Life Is All Wrong time. I was just shaken up.
The freedom I felt on that trip changed me. Facing home problems again overwhelmed me. Partly it was about health. But a change of place always overwhelms me, even when I love it.
Ming and I had a big argument. I have new things I want. Sometimes it’s hard to narrow an abstract concept down to actionable things to do.
This morning I made a list of things I love about my life, and things that hurt me. So I will work on that more, show Ming, and reach for more of what I love. How to mitigate the hurtful parts? Wish me luck.
artists
Yesterday I was reading a wikipedia article on a zinester who sounds pretty amazing: Mira Bellwether, who wrote a zine guide to sex with transwomen.
She was controversial, and I feel sad she died young. I’m sorry about the lung cancer. I’m sorry that’s one of the shame-iest cancers, and the immediate question is whether they smoked. If they smoked, then I guess they deserved to die in a dysfunctional medical system and emotionally defunct culture that didn’t support their needs.
Hmm! The lengths people will go through to believe they are safe. “Did they smoke? Were they fat? Whatever they did to cause their own demise, I will not do, so I’m safe. I will live forever,” the worried person thinks as the clock ticks.
Sorry, no one will live forever. Hating on others will not keep you safe. Safety only comes with love in community.
mugolio
So I wanted to tell you about that. I hope you can read the wikipedia article, if not the important zine she made, Fucking Trans Women. I love an 80 page zine, #0.
Also I wanted to update you that my mugolio is coming along. Slowly but slowly. I hope it’s delicious.
