Hello, reader. How are you doing? Do you know how to relax?
Sort of like how to celebrate, and how to have fun, the concept is confusing. I know how to celebrate and have fun in my own way. But it might not look like what culture says.
No, my way of relaxing can’t be seen on a beer commercial, cat food commercial, or any commercial. I don’t see advertising for the things I like to do.
how to relax
How do you relax?
My mom used to read the Sunday newspaper. Sounds so old fashioned now. I remember the smell of the ink, the sound of the large pages rustling. She would tell me the funnies she found funny.
Sometimes my parents would do the puzzles. I was not into that. But if they asked me verbally, I would tell them my answer to a puzzle.
Wow, seems so long ago. Also on the topic of how to relax, my mom would watch movies on netflix. She would sit on the couch in her pajamas, read the newspaper, watch movie after movie, and crochet. She had fuzzy cartoon character slippers, some years. I’m talking weekends.
My mom would eat eggs and toast often, and leave her blue edged Corel plate on a side table with a fork and some residue of black pepper. A small puddle of condensation or oil.
Yikes–the nostalgia. If I took her plate to the kitchen, she would say thank you.
these days
These days to relax, what do I do? Writing heals me and clears my cache. It’s like taking a shower or sleeping. Deeply relaxing.
Making art relaxes me in a healing way as well. Ah, what a relief. It’s like if you walk around accumulating static electricity, then touch a door handle and all the static electricity leaves your body, but without the painful shock. With pleasure instead.
Or like setting down a burden you didn’t know you were carrying. Or just a reset, a shake of the etch-a-sketch.
Today I got a massage; it helps with my pain. There’s a lady I trust, these days. She pushes really light and listens to me. She’s experienced, and it’s relaxing to hand over my body to her for an hour. At least for a short time, I don’t have to carry my health alone.
Soaking in hot water can be relaxing. Or it can be too warm and stress me out.
Touch with a friend can relax me, especially Ming.
what is unrelaxing
Parties? Hell no. Parties and other social events are the opposite of relaxing. They stress me the fuck out.
Caring for a pet? Hell no. I don’t have a pet. I have plants, which are responsibility enough.
Using substances? No, I don’t enjoy alcohol or weed or other drugs. I fell anxious and paranoid, and addiction runs in my family. I want to avoid all that.
I’ll use oatstraw to mildly sedate myself sometimes, but it’s more for health than to relax. I mean it’s not with a smile. It’s more of a medicinal, cautionary measure.
art
I had another essay published in Communities magazine. I’m happy about it, and I took the photos too.
I bought a new kilt–this one is orange. Some brilliant person or persons made it in Pakistan. So it was not my art, but I felt like art wearing it. Photo by my homegirl.
Ming says cooking is relaxing to me. Yes, sometimes–especially when I don’t need to wash the dishes. I’ve been processing loquats I picked near Sacramento on our trip.
