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Dangerous Compassions

retiring

fat person smiling wears headphones and stands by a mossy wall

Hello, reader.  How are you?  I’m thinking of retiring from daily blogging.  It’s been a good run.  About 17 years blogging almost every day?  That’s pretty wild.  Way not to moderate, Laura-Marie.  Yes, I often do something daily or not at all.

I’m grateful for what I’ve done–I don’t regret it.  But maybe my energy could do something else now.

family

I used to blog for my mom.  It was a way of keeping in touch, across the miles.  Then she died.  I sort of blog for Ming now.  Ming does enjoy reading my posts every day and telling me his favorite part.

But what if I put my 8 of pentacles energy elsewhere?  I guess I never found the success I was looking for.  It’s ok being small scale, with zines and blogs and art.  But I wish the world was more hungry for what I make.

That’s ok–the world is hungry for what it’s hungry for.  I never wanted fame or a lot of money.  But I would like to help the world.  Maybe this is not the way.

It’s not that I’ll quit blogging–by retiring, I’ll just do it less.  I’ve heard twice a week is optimal for SEO.

I value things that don’t seem to matter much to other people.  For example, I think my altar is so beautiful.  Figuring out truths about power feels important.  Fat liberation is so vital, and modeling joy in my body just as it is.  But maybe the world doesn’t need that, not from me.

If I was a thin white guy with a PhD, would people care what I say?  Who knows.  It could be marketing, partly chance, or someone influential believed in them and promoted them in a way that never happened to me.

Well, then I will let it go.  I’ve embarked on this year of being extra kind to my body.  Maybe I can take the time and energy I used to blog daily to visit nature, rest more, and cook even more delicious foods.

Or I could shunt more energy to other writing projects, like the I like your stims website about autistic liberation.  Maybe the world would like that one.

sads

If you hear some sads, that’s because I feel sad, reader.  Thank you for being there for me.  Hopefully you will still read at a less frequent rate.

By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

5 replies on “retiring”

I look forward to your writing whenever i get the chance to read it, the work you’ve put in it has helped me every day and given me a lot to think about. Thank you for it!

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