Dangerous Compassions


Hello, reader.  How are you?  I wanted to tell you something that matters to me.  I got a kilt.

fat person in a black kilt, wearing a black sweater, stands in front of stairs and a porch

Wow, I’ve wanted a kilt for decades.  How did that take so long?  I’m happy because it was rather easy.  I used a custom kilt company.  My credit union blocked the transaction because the billing is Pakistan.  Racism, racial profiling, just scam trends?  I paid another way.

Ming got a kilt too, also black but a slightly different style, and his is the standard length of 24 inches.  Mine is 22 inches, as I have short legs.

I love how it feels–more comfortable than I expected.  And I love that my housemate helped me fix it.  I made a mistake measuring myself, not comprehending the way they hang.  My hips are bigger than my waist, so I needed to say more like 55 than 50 inches.  Oops.

I’m fortunate my housemate-friend can sew, and has a sewing machine and a kind heart.  She enjoyed my enthusiasm and helped me quickly.


You know how some autism people like to wear the same clothes every day?  Well, I might need more black tank tops, because I want to wear my kilt every day so far.

Yeah, we went and looked at a train today too.  Autism cliches for the win.

I have these large breasts; playing with gender in costuming has been difficult for me.  But a kilt is a great way I can wear boy clothes.  And this kilt looks great with my breasts.  There is no contradiction here.  I can be my whole self.  I feel so happy like I will cry.

trike like

“It’s like your trike,” Ming said.

We were out driving for our anniversary, getting a little ways out of town.

“How is it like my trike?” I asked.  “Like–why did I wait so long, to get the thing I needed?”

With both, I thought the expense would be much greater.


I live so much in the inner life.  Sometimes I prioritize the inner life too much.  A wonderful thing in the outer life can do so much work.

Yes, I’m 46 years old and just learning this.  I’m transformed by deeper knowledge about the power of costuming and props.  I needed a trike to be a trikeslut, and it helped me check out more dumpsters, love graffiti, and do guttermancy.  The right tool or prop or costume can blow my mind.  Let’s do it.

By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *