my new tattoo

Hello, reader.  How are you doing?  I wanted to tell you about my new tattoo.  It’s my first tattoo: a snake on my chest.

Only problem is it keeps getting delayed.  My dear housemate’s travel plans–the delivery of a thinner needle to get the tongue right.  Then my own illness.  I hope it happens in a few weeks.

commitment

I’ve thought about tattoos for most of my life.  Many of my friends have tattoos–maybe most of my friends.  But I thought I would never get one.  Seemed too strong a commitment.  I was afraid it would feel claustrophobic, to have that image on me all my life.

My dad told me 30 years ago that he might want a wolf or a moon.  I saw a barista at Temple Coffee in Sacramento about ten years ago with an amazing squid tattoo on his arm.  Wow.  I also saw some pretty feather tattoos.  Those tattoos showed me new possibilities.  I’d thought of tattoos more as blurry navy anchors and a hula girl who dances when an elder flexes his arm muscle.

A few years ago I wanted countless rabbits tattooed on my feet.  Abstract angular rabbits, overlapping, on both my feet.  It made sense to me, a blessing for my feet of motion, health, and energy.

snake

This new tattoo is a snake on my chest.  I’ve loved snakes for a long time.  Actual snakes in real life, I give respectful distance.  Never would I want a pet snake, or to hang out with snakes in a planned way.

I’m happy to see snakes when I’m on a walk, but I tend to scream.  Yes, I have a big reaction to those beings.  I’m not a snake–I just love them.

Snakes have been in my dreams, and snake skins.  They are powerful symbolically.  My birthday ritual last September, I included a snake skin, and Imbolc ritual this year.  I have part of a snake skin on my altar right now.

I love shedding–I have so much to shed.  From the lining of my uterus once a month, to family fears that are not really mine, especially my mom’s fears.  Norms my culture taught me that I don’t need any more or never needed.  Ideas of how to get safety through white men and money–yuck.  I’m trying to shed those ideas right now.  They’ve created havoc in my life.

One day, I will shed my own body.  These days I shed skin cells, shed hair, shed days, shed seasons and dreams.

I can’t accumulate all the time.  Shedding is a huge part of life I need to embrace.  Send the stationery–give away the jewelry.  Sell the zines, or stuff them in little free libraries.  Not quite death cleaning, but I want to move shit on.  Nothing should be stuck.  Goodness is not for me to hoard–it’s to share, or give back to the earth.  I need to stay in motion.

earth energy

Also I love snakes as earth energy: quick manifestation of movement life fore.  I love the idea of Snake Mother.  She might lay eggs that are long with leathery shells, and slither away.

I remember when I was a kid, reading in a book about snake babies.  The book characterized Snake Mother as a bad mother, for abandoning her babies.  I remember wrestling with that idea for a long time.

So strange how humans project human ways onto other animals All Freakin’ Day.  I love bad mothers and good.  I love the mother who stays, and the mother who leaves.

As a non-mother, I left so hard, I pre-left.  I never had kids at all.  In that sense, I’m both the best mother and the worst.  Bring it!

necklace

I have sensory issues, and wearing jewelry is hard for me.  Once upon a time, right when Ming and I were getting ready to leave Las Vegas…

We had announced our plan to leave Las Vegas.  We went to the park to meet with some community members as part of the goodbye process.  I found in the grass a snake necklace that amazed me.

Wow, I didn’t even know to want something like that.  And there it was, sparkling in the grass.  I picked it up.  I put the snake charm on pink variegated hemp cord as a necklace.

Wow, I wish to always wear that necklace, but sensory-wise, it annoys me.  I thought about pinning the snake pendant to my clothing every morning.  That was be a way to keep it with me, and express my commitment to that idea of shedding.  I need the snake energy.

symbol

That’s when I realized a snake tattoo would be a great idea.  I could keep the symbol with me always, without effort.  It wouldn’t activate my sensory issues.

Being marked my Snake, I would feel stronger.  Finally I had a great reason to get a tattoo.

Here’s a drawing Ming did for me, where I want my new tattoo.