Dangerous Compassions

out of gender

“We’re all out of gender.  So I’ll go to the store,” Ming said.

“What?” I asked.

“I’ll go to the store for gender.  And lettuce for the salad,” he said.

“Why would you buy gender?” I asked.  “We have way too much gender around!  Let us run out!”

“Ginger.  We’re out of ginger,” he said.

“Oh!” I said.  I started laughing.  “I thought you said out of gender–I love that idea of running out of gender.”

gender is a scam

Gender is a scam.  Another idea I like a lot is No gender–no problem.  Gender is something I like to play with, but I never forget that I’m playing.

I’m grateful there are low consequences for me, as I’m seen as a cis lady and non-threatening.  My heart goes out to trans siblings who have much higher stakes.  I’m trying to help make a world where all are respected and free.  Takes a minute.  I love you.


Yes, I needed ginger for the dal.  And indeed, it was delicious.  That meal was dal, rice and peas, cornbread, and salad.  All vegan.

I thought of a favorite line from a They Might Be Giants song Stand On Your Own Head: “We are out of furniture.”

I loved that song when I was a kid.  It also has “I love the world, and if I have to sue for custody, I will sue for custody!”  What a great divorce song.  I hear it, it ends, and the next song on the album starts playing in my head immediately.

we rise

I’ve been listening to and enjoying this song We Rise lately.  It feels very comforting.

Churchy but ok with me.  When I hear it, I feel supported in a wholesome way.  I like to listen to it over and over again.


Yes, we’ve been using gender way too much lately.  I’d love to try something else.  Or as Ming says–eltze.

As for food!  Here are pics from pea protein sausage fest 2022.

out of gender

Yes, it happened.  The sausages were ten for $2 at grocery outlet.  We made 30 of them.  So tasty.

Also we had local quail eggs, local delicata squash, roasted root veg, and rice with peas.  What a meal!  Just what I needed.

Thank you to Ming for all your help, and thank you to the grateful eaters who inspire the good cooks.

no gender


By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

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