Dangerous Compassions



Hello, I’ve been thinking about sewing–I want to make a pillow.  It’s delicious to consider.  I fantasize about pillow making often!  It comforts me.

A few months ago, I bought some inexpensive fabric from a thrift store, when we were on that trip to my homeland.  The fabric is fun.  We washed it, and I’ve used some to embroider upon.

Now I want to make a pillow.  I’ve considered many shapes.  Rectangular, round, or oval as a small pillow for between my knees, when I lie on my side to reduce my leg pain.

Sometimes I think I’d like to make more like a zafu, with depth to it, maybe stuffed with buckwheat hulls.  I daydream and consider cutting out the fabric.  But I didn’t have anything to fill it with.

ask and you shall receive

I considered asking a local friend if she has extra stuffing.  Many people must need fill for their project, and are left with half a bag that sits around in a closet for years.

Then I asked for shoes and fill in an Ojai facebook group.  Wow, less than 24 hours later, I have three pairs of shoes, three pillow forms, some buckwheat hulls, and a bag of polyfill.  Pillow making is soon for me!

Thank you, generous strangers.  You made my day.  (The shoes are to protect my feet when I help with the chickens.)

When Ming and I were staying at airbnbs often, when we were without a home, they usually had an iron and ironing board.  Seemed like a great way to iron a buncha fabric for sewing.


Other sewing thoughts…  Recently I learned about a company in the UK that helps you design your own clothes.


Also there’s a place Hello Stitch that helps people learn how to sew, in the Bay Area.  I’m curious about them.  If Ming and I end up settling there, maybe I can sew more there?

joyfully slow

I like to sew in my own way.  Sewing machines stress me out.  They’re too fast.  I’m always afraid of mishaps.  I feel joyfully slow and cautious.

Other people don’t own how to sew.  Using thread to join cloth to cloth is an old thing to do.  I can do it my own way, like leadership, art making, the creation of delicious smoothies.  I can reinvent sewing in a way that works for me, respecting my own needs–my chronic pained body, my unique mind.

It’s important that I not feel bogged down by the past.  Kinda like yoga.  Am I doing it wrong?  Well, does it feel good to my body and help me feel stronger?  Someone had to make it up.

What if I made a new form of yoga, tai chi, or sewing?  I’m a valid person too.


That’s my needle case with some needles I threaded in excitement, anticipating a fun pillow making time.

By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

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