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Dangerous Compassions

pleasure and rest

Laura-Marie

I need more pleasure and rest.  Felt good to identify that, txting with a friend the other day.

When he asked “how are you doing?” I gave a thorough answer.  Moody, emotional, curious, happy, confused.  My pain level is going down, so I’m sleeping better–thank God.  But pleasure and rest are two nourishments I really need, lately.

rest choice

Rest can be hard to choose.  Lots of appealing Out things I’d like to do.  For example, in person ecstatic dance here in Las Vegas has started up again.

But I’m like–do I need to do more socially?  I can barely do the things I need to do now.  It would be $20 for three hours.  Sounds ok.  But I’d need to save up my spoons and then recover for a day or two afterward.  Does that make sense for me?

Yeah, maybe it does.  But I also want to do qigong, write in my journal, study Spanish, and do rituals more.  Garden more–learn more permaculture.  A lot that I want to do slips through the cracks.

I’m without fail making art, working on zines, writing letters, going for walks every morning, cooking delicious veg foods.  Doing basic health stuff like showers and prayer.

My life is so full.  Txting friends, seeing a friend now and again.  Inter-depending with Ming, all day, every day.

pleasure

As for pleasure, more touch from Ming and from me–that’s a good choice.  After a shower, putting some calendula oil on my arms and legs.  Rubbing my own neck a lil bit, where the muscles are sore.

Hugs, kisses, cuddles from Ming are good.  Holding hands is always good.  If I had my way, I would be touched a lot a lot a lot.  I’m a please touch me all the time person.  I’m the opposite of a never touch me person.

Chocolate is a good pleasure, but it’s not what I need for the well-being of my body.  My histamine and food sensitivity issues mean chocolate is a struggle for my body to handle.  Not as bad as corn or mushrooms, but pretty bad.  It’s a trade-off.

Laughter–I need more funny stuff.  Sometimes I don’t know to seek that out.  Where is funny that will not hurt me with misogyny, anti-queerness, rude stuff about crazy people or fat people?  Easier not to try, sometimes.

garlic

Garlic is a joy.  Yes, I need more garlic in my life.  I have a cool new way to eat garlic I thought you might like to know.

Used to be, garlic was a favorite condiment.  I loved to cook a sweet potato and put tahini and raw garlic minced on it.  And salt.  Mm, yummy yummy.

Then I had a bad experience where I had too much raw garlic in my mouth at once, and it overwhelmed me.  I got a barf response.  Oops,  I didn’t actually barf, but the nausea was bad enough that I didn’t want to do that anymore.  I laid off the raw garlic for a while, except I would put a little when I made pesto.

carrots

I had a cool idea about carrots, that I want more carrots shredded in my life, like in my salads.  Lettuce and dressing salads are so sad.  I put on them some sunflower seeds unsalted, or pine nuts, but it’s still kind of inadequate.

I thought I could use the microplaner to grate half a carrot into my salad easily, making it much more joyful and lively.  And pretty!

I tried it–took some muscle power.  Grating is a moment of effort!  But it was delicious.  But I realized I could use the microplaner to grate garlic into my salad too.

breakfast

Yes!  So good!  And now today I used the micorplaner to grate some garlic into my breakfast.  And it was glorious.

Breakfast was quinoa cooked with salt and cauliflower.  In my bowl I added: butter, half a large clove of garlic microplane grated.  Pine nuts, and a hunk of cream cheese.

Probably you think that’s a weird breakfast.  Well, I was moaning.  The wetness and softness of the quinoa, cauliflower, butter, and cream cheese was divine.  The garlic flavor in there was intense but not overwhelming.

Everything melanged together into creamy, lovely bliss.  The pine nuts had an exciting contrast, with their tree flavor and more solid texture.  It was just a great breakfast.  I look forward to making it again soon.

walk

Morning walk was good today–pretty clouds and moon.moon and clouds

I love you.  Pleasure and rest to you too.

Ming

By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

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