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Dangerous Compassions

the suspense is killing me– I hope it lasts

flowers to share

Today we made a delivery of flowers to the halfway house nearby. It was something I’d thought up and planned out, collecting jars for the vases–a pasta sauce jar, an olive jar, and two little yogurt jars.

It went very well. I kept a few flowers for myself. There’s a lily I think will bloom later today or tomorrow. I’m in suspense.

I was rude to Ming this morning. Something he said bothered me, and I reacted in a way that wasn’t nice. It’s hard for me to tell how mean I was or where it came from. I apologized. I don’t want to be like that.

Luckily, this is unusual. Something about help, the kinds of support I want, certain parts of me feeling neglected. Not by him–not really about him at all. More about when I was a kid, and how hard it can be to ask for things.

Yesterday I made a mistake and got too stressed to the point where I was in the danger zone. Hopefully next time I’ll set better boundaries. I really need to take it easy today. That much stress can turn into its own problem: trauma about trauma. I got some extra sleep this morning, which is a miracle!

So if you need your bomb deactivated, your lost dog found, your pool party lifeguarded, or your finances put in order, please consider asking a different friend for help today.

If you need to find me to deliver chocolate or a mysterious telegram, I’m going to be lying on the beach on a huge colorful towel, under a magical shady awning, sipping a relaxing beverage, looking at clouds, and wearing a bikini. Ming will be nearby drawing pictures of seabirds and smoking a pipe with nothing in it. Hahahahaha!

Maybe we should become professional flower deliverers, for our own neighborhood only. We could set up a florist shop in the driveway. It could be called Anarchy Flowers: Bright Beauty Brought By Trike. We could take donations and give all the money to the Worker. Hmm, sounds like fun. Let’s do it.

By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

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