Hey, guess what? The asian pear tree we planted in the courtyard came to life. It looked like dead sticks for a time. I wondered if it was ok. Then these beautiful leaves emerged. Thank God for spring.
Are they the most tender, vulnerable things ever, or is it just me?
The other asian pear that’s planted in the driveway, to pollinate this courtyard tree–it’s still looking like sticks. I hope it’s just a late bloomer.
“Why are you standing there with your hands in your shirt like a second grader?’ I asked Ming.
“I’m trying to figure out what to do!” he said. He moved his hands around each other, nervously, inside his shirt, like a second grader.
“Hmm, it all makes sense now,” I said. “Now that I understand you’re a second grader!”
The days are running together weirdly. Did that happen today, yesterday…? I forgot to leave the compound. It seems more compoundy, now that we might get locked down. I had friends in jail who got locked down a lot, then other lands.
Anxiety is part of life, for me. I see people panicking. I think, “I could feel all those feelings with half my wits tied behind my back.” I have a lot of experience.
My favorite part of “Lovesong” by the Cure is “whatever words I say, I will always love you.” I like the way he’s insisting–don’t listen to what I tell you later. Listen to what I tell you right now. This is the real truth right now. Evocative.
I like being alone with people too. Love you!