Dangerous Compassions

banana phones, garden mantises, survival

“Why do I spend so much time talking to bananas?” I asked.  I have the bad habit of praying to my food.

“Because they look like phones?” Ming suggested.

How many times have I answered a ringing banana.  “Hello?  Oh, it’s for you,” and handed off a banana to a smiler.  Not enough times, really.

Bananas are easy to talk to.  Comical, yellow.

Yesterday I tried to watch a friend’s movie.  I got four minutes in and hit pause, overwhelmed.

Who is this world designed for?  I guess I mean culture.  Some people seem to get by ok.  But depression and anxiety are pandemic.

Sometimes I feel this world was designed for someone who doesn’t exist.  Everyone’s a square peg.

Yesterday I almost went to the ER–today I feel pretty ok.  Life is confusing, and medicine feels like a guessing game.  I’m tired of swimming upstream, but I guess that’s life.

Someone used to say life was directing a stream of negative entropy upon yourself.  Who used to say that to me?  Probably John Dobson.

One of the cool things about Ming is how he can watch a two hour superhero movie full of explosions one day, and look at praying mantises in silence for 15 minutes outside our front door the next.  I am a specialized person.  Ming is more varied, and I love him.

I was the one watching him watch mantises for 15 minutes.  I need to dance, eat breakfast, take a shower, and hope I can survive this day.

By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

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