Dangerous Compassions

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Yesterday was so weird.  I got really angry in the morning.  I found out there was a mistake with some bureaucratic crap. 

Basically, someone else screwed up on some paperwork, so I have to spend hours taking care of it, trying to clear up their errors.  I was on the phone for hours, mostly on hold.  Finally found someone who would help me.  But she never called back yesterday afternoon to say it was resolved.  I hope she calls this morning.

It made me feel vulnerable.  How could this happen, just out of nowhere?

Fantasies of running away.  Going off grid–no ID, no health insurance, no credit card, no cell phone.  Another country, another name.

We live with a guy who’s like that.  He doesn’t get any mail.  No driver’s license, no nothing.  It’s like he’s invisible.

“Do we really want to aspire to that?” Ming asked.

I feel like there are happy ways to do it.  Huge garden, maybe chickens, collecting rainwater, solar panels on the roof.  It doesn’t have to have a sneaking around attitude.  It could have a joyful attitude.

I mentioned running away to a friend.  She told me there’s nowhere to go–she’s tried.

But maybe that’s the kind of thing I would need to experience for myself.  I used to have those fantasies about taking over an abandoned cocoa farm in Mexico. 

Then I was remembering how much earlier, 20 years ago, I used to want to move to Baja.  I read The People’s Guide to Mexico and was charmed.

It’s starting to get hot, but I have a positive attitude about June still.  We can do this.

By Laura-Marie

Good at listening to the noise until it makes sense.

2 replies on “insert title here”


I sometimes feel like running away. I think I would go to Russia or South America. I have a fantasy of roaming freely. Create a new identity. My partner could come with me. I might move to the Bay Area and bake cookies. Or move to Mount Fuji and make origami whales. There is a concept known as vagabonding. “I’m leaving on a jet plane”.

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