Today I painted a scarf. It was at the women’s center I go to. I would like to show you a picture and might tomorrow. It’s yellow and orange with green. I used paint and epsom salt and an iron. A paintbrush, my hands. Soap and water, water, the wind, the air. It was fun but nerve wracking because everyone’s looking and judging, sometimes commenting. I wish I could make art lower pressure.
I was there a long time, making two scarves–one for me and one for them to sell at a fundraiser. I had to choose which to keep. I wore it as I walked home, and it matched my shirt.
I got too hungry and asked for a snack. M gave me a granola bar. My therapist was there, and she side-hugged me. I explained to her that I thought there were about 30 people interviewed for the video, but I found out there were really six. I realized they would undoubtedly use some of the footage featuring me, and I was like oh shit. When I thought there were about 30 people interviewed, I felt way safer.
What else? I wanted to go to an All Bodies yoga class this morning, but I had some questions and no one called me back, so I didn’t go. I worked on a new zine. We walked to the co-op for quick oats and summer fruit. I like making refrigerator oatmeal in the summer.